All done! :) My best friend is amazing. Thank you for this gift, and everything else you do for me. I love you til infinity @bnasty
I never intended for things to be this way
A home, collapsed to such shambles
A mess of sweat, minds, and misery
You crumbled my once-mighty being to that of less than a whole human
Until I was merely a reflection of all the pieces of you that you were never strong enough to embrace
Were you embarrased of me?
Or was that fear I saw living behind your tricky gentle gaze?
Fear that I could destroy you
Fear that you may have met your ultimate match
For months, I triumphed
We triumphed
My bi-polar streak cured itself and my brain was clear
Not once did the ink of sorrow bleed from my wrists
Happy people cannot write, you see
For they are far too engulfed in their damn six foot smiles that the world stops turning around them
You stopped my world from turning
You stripped me of my ability to pour words onto paper in strings of release
The power to ease my self-destructive mind
My only escape
I never intended for things to be with way
A home, collapsed to such shambles
I guess I just love language more than humanity
(Source: br33bles)
Memory
I’m not sure why I don’t remember
Why pieces of my memory, of me, are just missing
Like a safe key, so worn down that the teeth can’t re-assume their form
Alas, this key cannot serve its purpose
Did I do this to myself?
I remember waiting
You never failed to fail
Criss-cross I sat, in the middle of the street
Hoping some unsuspecting station wagon would run me over
Just another human speed bump conquered
I remember being alone
Watching the jumble of colors consume the sky
Burnt orange and yellow
Peace by sunset
Why months passed between night fall…
I don’t know
Were you ever there?
You smelled of cinnamon and tobacco
Oh, how those scents repelled me
Your house…was always dark
Do you smile with the lights off?
This home is merely a reflection of my rib cage
Dingy and decaying
“Once you can’t remember the last time you’ve eaten, it’s not so depressing anymore”
I heard you mutter that once or twice
I’m not sure why I don’t remember
The light behind these eyes comes and goes as it pleases
Merely a flicker of hope, no more
What I see I can hardly control
Please, find a fresh soul to taunt
You’ve stolen everything I am
I’m not sure when I began to forget…
But I don’t want to remember
(Source: br33bles)
My brain is merely a make-shift box of jumbled emotions.
It orders me to drag my feet
Constantly bear the simplest of scowls
Angry for reasons I don’t understand
Infuriated because I can’t explain
Words stick to the insides of my lips
Fierce, harsh, rough….uncomfortable as hell
Sanity lies in my isolation and solitude
Only the bane of my existence
I wish I could cut my own heart out
Just another pulsating mortal reminder
My chest could be no less hollow than it’s current withering state
I don’t fear you.
Eat me alive.
(Source: br33bles)
